character flaw

Apparently a fatal flaw I have is the result of not having more than a handful of friends....as such, I've learned (the hard way) it's not my itention that matters it's perception of others that I'm just a bit more friendly than maybe I should be. In addition to this character trait is another flaw and also potentially fatal, REWARDING trust up front rather than making people earn it. Simply stated...being nice -is going to be the death of me.

For me, having grown up in an environment that meant a lot of frequent change, I developed a knack for making friends fast. Unfortuneatly, when I decide I like someone..I'm all in! I forget that it takes time to be sure you are not going to be misunderstood, mistaken or used. And more times than I care to admit in the past couple of months these two things slapped me in the face. Hard!

I find that if I am not careful, people read too much into my words and actions. Which honestly, just freakin kills me. If I cannot find comfort in being myself, I will be someone else and that makes me just like everyone else.

I refuse!

I am not going to water down my personality.
I am not going to defend my nature.
I am not going to require anyone to earn my trust. RESPECT, however is a whole other matter! And the folks who have slighted me and made horrid accusations will now need to prove their own maturity and I'll decide if they will be in my hallowed and rather small group of friends.

SPANK BANK

In the unlikely event you have not heard this term, let me take a few moments...It's a "wish" list - - - the kind you don't discuss with just anyone and the list you NEVER put anyone except celebrities for a number of reasons, most of which SHOULD be very obvious. Jeff and I had this confab recently with some friends and oddly enough something I hadn't previously given much thought so, in the sprit of sharing here goes : in no particular order and subject to change

tim mcgraw
josh (the guy from Las Vegas and more recently Transformers) I'd prefer not to spell the last name incorrectly
steven tyler
george clooney
matthew mc....omg
tom cruise (but only if he keeps his cakehole shut)
carey hart
the lead dudes from maroon 5 & nickleback

.......

Maturity = Tolerance

Without being more specific than I need to at this moment, I want to take a few minutes and talk about something very important. It's called being grown up. I have spent the greater part of many recent days trying to figure out why so many of the people I know and or love and or work with are not as mature as they should be. Why is it that very few folks are tolerant? I am not talking politics here, it's way more simpler than that. I don't care if you have a different opinion, I care if you are tolerant enough to respect that your view, your way of life, your otherwise "best practice" is not the same as anyone else's. It's really quite simple, if you don't like it, build a freakin bridge and get over it! Get over yourself. Get over your anger! Get over your preconceived, pre-determined, relative, subjective and highly annoying self centered opinion and move on or over. Just move. Open your mind and your heart to something other than yourself.

ok, I think that is enough for now.....maybe

way too long

It's been almost three months since my last post. Life is hard, there isn't enough time...scratch that, I haven't made time and it is getting to me. I need to tell a story. I need to share my feelings. I need to write. Even if no one listens and no one cares. Blogging makes me feel good and I have a few things to get off my mind. Be warned, the next few posts are PURE rants!